Empathy and the Legacy of Rob Riley: Reflecting on His Life and Tragic Suicide

Remembering Rob Riley: A Lesson in Empathy

Even to this day, in my late 50s, producing award-winning audio stories about Australia, I still cannot understand how human beings can be so mean and negative. As I reflect on nearly 30 years since the late Rob Riley took his life in a Perth hotel room in 1996, I am reminded of the vital role that empathy plays, not only in healing communities but also in saving lives.

The Extraordinary Life of Rob Riley

Rob Riley was more than a community leader; he was a hero to many of us. When I arrived in Perth in 1990, Rob and I became fast friends, always there to support each other. Through his tireless work, Rob fought institutional racism, built community organisations, and challenged unjust state government policies that oppressed the poor and Indigenous people of Australia. He was respected and loved, not just by his own people but by all who understood the importance of true empathy.

Rob's Achievements and His Commitment to Justice

• Built and led several key community organisations to empower Indigenous Australians
• Played a pivotal role in lobbying for fair legislation at both state and federal levels
• Consistently challenged policies that perpetuated institutional racism in Australia

Rob's courage was legendary. Whether speaking up against racism in meetings with government officials or acting as a spokesperson during crisis moments, Rob always put the needs of his community first. He was never afraid to say what needed to be said, even when it made him a target. As one friend recalled, Rob was willing to 'sit there for hours and listen to the racism and ignorance,' always advocating for what was right.

The Day Everything Changed: A Call for Empathy

In 1996, everything changed. Rob Riley made the mistake of drink driving. It was one human error, but the impact was devastating. When news broke, Rob called me in deep distress. I will never forget sitting down to lunch with him, urging him to fight back, to talk to the community, and to say sorry as he wished to do. I told him, 'You are my hero, Rob.' His pain was palpable, and, unfortunately, empathy was in short supply from the very systems he had fought to reform.

The Power—and Limits—of Public Apology

• Rob's instinct was to apologise to the police officers involved, demonstrating profound empathy and integrity.
• Public opinion, however, was harsh. We expected too much from Rob Riley and, in our disappointment, did not extend the empathy we asked him to show others.

In the wake of the drink driving incident, Rob was judged not as a whole person but by a single mistake. This lack of empathy from a community he had uplifted spotlighted the persistent effects of institutional racism and societal pressures on leaders of change.

Empathy: The Answer to Institutional Racism

Institutional racism remains a reality in Australia, from policies that control Indigenous communities to the subtle, everyday actions that deny people dignity. If you are unfamiliar with this term, I urge you to search 'institutional racism'. Educate yourself and those around you—because change begins with awareness and empathy.

What Rob Taught Us About Empathy

• Empathy is not just about feeling for others—it is about standing with them, even when things get tough.
• True community leadership means admitting mistakes, apologising, and rebuilding trust.
• We all have a responsibility to bridge gaps created by ignorance and prejudice.

Rob defended his people fiercely, much like the frilleneck lizard whose nickname he bore. He walked proud, stood tall, and never hesitated to protect his community and beliefs. If only we had shown him the same empathy he shared so freely with us, perhaps things could have turned out differently.

The Lasting Impact of Rob Riley

Rob Riley's legacy lives on in the many people he inspired. Over the years, strangers and friends alike have stopped me on the street, sharing how Rob changed their lives with his courage and compassion. Sadly, many never told him directly, demonstrating how easily we withhold empathy until it is too late.

How You Can Promote Empathy Today

1. Listen without judging—give people space to share their experiences.
2. Challenge policies and structures that perpetuate racism or oppression.
3. Support individuals in your community when they falter—offer help, not criticism.
4. Speak up: Use your platforms, whether radio, social media, or conversation, to amplify messages of empathy and inclusion.

Conclusion: Carrying the Torch of Empathy

Reflecting on Rob Riley’s life and tragic death reminds us all that empathy is both a shield and a salve. We must never forget the incredible impact one person can have—and the irreplaceable loss when society fails to support its heroes. Next time you see someone struggling, remember Rob: offer your empathy, speak words of kindness, and help build a more compassionate Australia.

If this story moved you, please share it with your friends, start a conversation about institutional racism, and commit to practicing empathy in your own life. Rob Riley’s legacy depends on all of us.